Day 4: The NBA Draft, pretty much the greatest night ever

Ah, children come close. For I am about to tell you a story of riches and excitement. It involves fresh-faced men and a rowdy crowd thirsty for hope. 'Tis the tale of the NBA Draft.

The Draft has long been one of my favorite non-sporting, sporting events of the year. It's way better than the NFL Draft and trumps the National Spelling Bee with ease. It's packed full of comedy with players emerging out of the stands and men talking about other men's length, upside and bounciness.

Last night, I attended the 2008 NBA Draft. My friend, Collin, went with me because my original partner, Charlie, was taking care of his sick girlfriend (Get well soon!) We started the night with gyros/pizza and then got free color-changing Sprite cups at the Draft. Below are my thoughts from the night. Most of them deal with the atmosphere because you could have picked up a lot of general stuff from the telecast, and I could only somewhat hear what the TV guys were saying.

— There were two big camps at the Draft. One for Michael Beasley. Several dozen people were wearing white T-shirts with "30" on them all in one corner. The other one was the OJ Mayo fan club. The Knicks wanted him bad. But unless they kidnapped Timberwolves GM Kevin McHale, they aren't going to get him. Chants of "O.J. Mayo" start early. One guy even brought a "Spread the Mayo" sign.

— A great thing about getting together a bunch of hardcore NBA fans is all the random old jerseys that get pulled out of the closet. Two rows in front of me there was a Nets Ed O'Bannon jersey and a Jalen Rose Bulls jersey (I saw two of these and the second had a "D." in marker before Rose). Also sighted were a Horace Grant Magic jersey and a Ryan Gomes Celtics jersey. Of the Knicks fans, the most prominent player is David Lee by far, which is great because I've heard him in several trade rumors already.

— Speaking of Knick fans, even mention Danielo Galanari and the fans boo. They don't want him. Guess who does? Knicks coach Mike D'Antoni. This is going to be great.

— When David Stern comes out to welcome everyone to the draft the fans pour hate on to him. "You Suck" and "I hate you" were some of the tamer comments yelled at the NBA commish. There is only one Tim Donaghy sign that I can see, so things are looking up.

— Things go smoothly for the first three picks. Rose-Beasley-Mayo. Cheers for all three. When the Sonics come up to pick, I hold up my "Save Our Sonics" sign made in homage to Van, Alex and Charlie. (All Sonic fans) Some guy behind me asks why a guy dressed in Magic stuff holding up a sign for the Sonics? I tell him it's for my friends that aren't here, he doesn't seem to care. He then asks to see my other sign ("Draft Aleks Maric") To which he replies, "I think I played with Maric in high school." I don't think he knows Maric is from Australia.

— It's time for the Knicks to pick. Watch my video down below. High comedy. Shortly after the pick, Knicks fans start to chant: "Jer-rad Bay-liss," "USA, USA" and "Fire Walsh." Knick fans are always entertaining. Anyway, the theater starts to clear out.

— The next big pick is the Nets. Ed O'Bannon does not like the pick of Brook Lopez. I try to comfort him and tell him that the Nets could pick twin brother Robin Lopez at No. 21. He doesn't like that suggestion one bit.

— The first round trudges on and I start talking to people around me. The guy to my left went to Duke and want the Magic to give J.J. Reddick some love. I say not going to happen because the Magic are likely to draft another 2 at 22. A girl in front of me went to Rider, the college of No.
12 Jason Thompson. She seems uninterested.

— One of the most disturbing trends of the night is the horrible music selections played right after some one's name is announced. They just played "Low" by Flo Rider when Robin Lopez was picked. Earlier "Back in Black" serenaded Eric Gordon onto the stage. Either Mayo or Love heard Lenny Kravitz's "Fly Away" after getting picked and I think Westbrook listened to U2's Beautiful Day. Alexis Ajinca gets "My Love" by Justin Timberlake. This trend would continue to the second round when "September" by Earth, Wind and Fire, "ABC" by the Jackson 5 and other random selections were played.

— After seeing Robin Lopez up close, I'm sure he'd give Carrot Top a run for the money to play Sideshow Bob is a real-life Simpsons was ever made.

— Amazingly I zone out for about three minutes while Dick Vitale rambles on about something.

— Mark Jackson tells the Cavs they need a "fresh piece of gum." At least that's what it sounded like to me.

— The first trade of the night: Bayliss and Ike Diago for Rush and Jack. No one likes it except for the Pacers fan. I disagree.

— Magic select Courtney Lee. I like the pick. Brandon Rush was my wish pick, but it became clear that he wasn't going to be around at 22. (I mentioned Speights to the guy in front of me and not more than 30 seconds later, the 76ers pick him) It was either him or CDR. Lee can shoot better. Bye-bye J.J.

— On the other end of the section where we were sitting was the exit tunnel for all the players after they were chosen. This led to some fun interaction when they would boo foreign players and give props to others. About midway through the first round, an usher cleared everyone out to which the crowd chanted "Debbie Downer."

— Big cheers for Darrell Arthur, the last pick in the Green Room. Collin and I go over to the rail to slap his hand. There were a few Jayhawk T-Shirts.

— Whenever a Boston fan walks by the crowd starts taunting him. The Boston fan will then respond by pointing to his ring finger. This leads to two responses: Either the New Yorker flashes his middle finger or starts chanting "18-1" or "Let's go Giants" My brother bought me a Celtics shirt from his trip to Boston during the finals. I wore it under my Magic shirt. I think I will keep it there to save the berating.

— Just to prove they don't hold any grudges, Knick fans boo Larry Brown when he is interviewed. Later on, when Stuart Scott mentions Isiah Thomas, they boo more. They like their boos.

— For the second round, we get to move down to the lower section. There are probably only 150 people left and that will get smaller as the night goes on. This is what the draft is all about.

— One for the big trend of the Chad Ford era is for foreign guys to sit in the front and go up on stage even though they weren't invited to the Green Room. This happens three times with college players — Joey Dorcey, Mario Chalmers and DeAndre Jordan — which I can remember happening. They all seem to be happy to be here.

— Sitting closer to the TV crew, we get to interact with them more. Van Gundy and Mark Jackson banter with the crowd and seem to enjoy it. Jay Bilas is all business and Stu Scott also doesn't seem to care. At one point someone tells them to get together for a picture and JVG and Mark Jackson put their arms around each other and Bilas, but Stu remains slightly apart. I yell at Stu to pretend he likes them, to which he responds by looking at me and pointing to his ears saying he can't hear me. Whatever. He hates them. JVG and Jackson continue to entertain the crowd by dancing, pointing and even making a phone call to a fan's phone. They seem to be having a good time. They made the second round bearable.

— The most popular chant during the second round is "We want Russ" in homage to former NBA deputy commissioner Russ Granik. This is the second year of the new Russ, Adam Silver, who seems to enjoy his job, but gets no love from the crowd. The Russ chants go on pretty heavy for the first half of the second round. Sections cheer for him, but not a really good reception. Anyway, about halfway through a bunch of NBA flunkies (I say this because the were wearing NBA polos with ugly mismatched draft hats on) came out and told us to cheer for Adam Silver. If we did, we would get free stuff. One section goes nuts for him (it was the guy with the Italian flag for those that watched) and later they come out with Bulls hats to toss around. The rest of the crowd still chants their affection for Russ.

— Near the end, I started to hold up my "Draft Aleks Maric" sign. Got a nod from Jeff Van Gundy and Mark Jackson, but I don't think they know who he is. One guy in a Duquesne shirt gave me a shout out. Alas, I did not get on TV and Maric didn't get drafted.

— All in all, a great time. They handed out free Coke when we left, as Collin and I were among the last to leave at 12:30 a.m. Great time. If I think of anything else, I'll type it below.

LJLA